Victoria Police regard family violence and abuse as extremely serious, often resulting in criminal behaviour. The nature of violence in family relationships is seen as particularly insidious because it is an abuse of trust. There is often a continuing threat to a victim’s life, or the lives of their children and extended family members.
Working out whether you’re in an abusive relationship isn’t always easy. Learning the signs of an abusive relationship can give some perspective. Thinking that abusive behaviour is your fault is a common feeling, but it’s important to know that you’re never to blame for another person’s behaviour.
You might be in an abusive relationship if your partner…
- tries to control your behaviour
- gets jealous easily
- insults you in public or private
- makes you feel confused or like you are going ‘crazy’
- threatens violence against you, your pets, or people you love
- makes you feel scared
What is an abusive relationship?
Abuse is experienced in heaps of different ways and isn’t just limited to physical violence. An abusive relationship can include sexual, emotional and physical abuse, and can also involve control of finances.
Key signs of an abusive relationship
Possessiveness:
- Checking on you all the time to see where you are, what you’re doing and who you’re with.
- Trying to control where you go and who you can see and getting angry if you don’t do what they say.
Jealousy:
- Accusing you without good reason of being unfaithful or flirting.
- Isolating you from family and friends, often by rude behaviour.
Put downs:
- Putting you down, either publicly or privately, by attacking your intelligence, looks, mental health or capabilities.
- Constantly comparing you unfavourably with others.
- Blaming you for all the problems in the relationship, and for the times they are out of control or violent.
Threats:
- Yelling, sulking and deliberately breaking things that you value.
- Threatening to use violence against you, your family, friends or even a pet.
- Saying things like ‘no one else will want you’.
- Physical and sexual violence
- Pushing, shoving, hitting, grabbing, making you have sex or do things you don’t want to do
- Harming you, your pets or your family members
Crisis Assistance:
If You Are In Need Of Help
